Take a photograph, it'll be the last
Not a dollar or a crowd could ever keep me here
I don't have a past, I just have a chance
Not a family or honest plea remains to say

Rain rain go away, come again another day
All the world is waiting for the sun

Is it you I want, or just the notion of
A heart to wrap around, so I can find my way around
Safe to say from here, you're getting closer now
We are never sad 'cause we are not allowed to be

Rain rain go away, come again another day
All the world is waiting for the sun

Rain rain go away, come again another day
All the world is waiting for the sun

To lie here under you is all that I could ever do
To lie here under you is all

To lie here under you is all that I could ever do
To lie here under you is all

Rain rain go away, come again another day
All the world is waiting for the sun

Rain rain go away, come again another day
All the world is waiting for the sun
All the world is waiting for the sun
All the world is waiting for the sun

there's a call i've been dreading to make..
maybe tomorrow..
or the next..

i'm not ready..
maybe i'll never be..

4am in the morning found us...

...writing our wedding invites

we set up camp in the chillout room which we hardly used.
turned on the aircon, put on the CD for our wedding dinner,
and got to work.
sure set the mood for it.. the music is niceeeee.
spent 30mins at Sembawang @Compass Pt sieving CDs
and auditioning them. Got a winner.



the 2 imps sure love the chillout room.
with carpets, tatamis, an ole sheepskin and plenty of cushions..
they romped around and played tug of war.

we ended the night with johnny walker+coke.
and slept the entire day away.
this is life!

my internal clock has gone a little haywired.
i woke up at 5pm and now i'm starting to yawn.

oh, and...

Pirates of the Caribbean : At World's End RAWKS!!!!!

i slept with a brewing headache.
i woke up with a massive headache.
doesn't sleep help clear your head and rest your mind?
apparently mine doesn't.
been having problem with my sleep.
lovely.

my headache is so bad i gotta squint my eyes.
feel like there is a brick in there.
my only hope is that my boss will leave me alone this morning.
she hardly does.

maybe i have a tumour then zack will have his free house.
tough luck dude.
i'm a tough ole biatch.
too bad.

the RED comes after the BROWN

that BROWN face did it again....
another NEW FAVOURITE top GONE!
when i saw the holes on my new favourite knitted top (one that makes me look super slim and curvy).. i FEEL my eyes TURNING RED.
that's not the 1st new top she destroyed.
i had this pretty white top.. which i only wore twice.
i think i'd go crazy before she dies.
i'm halfway there already.

*sigh*

hollars: "How wants a Dachshund?? she's FREE and she looks mighty adoreable!"
i dont have to say looks are deceiving.
i've been conned!

i've got a sleeping disorder.
i'm finally admitting it.

i woke up at 2am last night
and couldnt sleep til 6.30am.
crap.
i was in bed.. tossing and turning.
head filled with thoughts.

dawned on me...
that dawn breaks ard 5am (bad pun)
when the sky turns to a vivid blue
my eyes blissfully closed..
for an hour.
crap.

i need some downtime.
i'm beginning to look like crap.

last friday..
i hit rock bottom.

on sunday..
i had a fight with this asshole.

he kicked Chile but missed.. cos that silly dog was sniffing ard his kids.
imagine i was chasing that brown face while she was happily chasing this kid who was running and screeching at the top of his voice like a chicken whose head been chopped off.
i finally caught her and glared at the asshole and said,
"Don't you dare kick my dog!"
then the fray begins...

touch my babies and you'd have me to reckon with! Nobody messes with what's mine.

i had to hurl that dog back home when 3mins later,
she ran out across the driveway and alongside a car.
Scared the living daylights out of me!
she's too much for me to handle.

so i took Pappe for a walk.
went to my sis's estate..
the roof garden.
where i used to bring her most Sunday late mornings.
(yes, there's a period of time Ju wakes up before noon on weekends)
it was just me and pap..
those were the days.

was browsing thru all my photos.
realised i didnt take many pics this year.
found one i've always considered my fav Krabi pic.
i miss those days..
when we were both giddy with love.
new love.. head over heels.
thrilling and intoxicating.
the time when i was still perfect in his eyes.
the time when all we worry about was our next holiday destination.
the time when things were simpler.
the time when.... i was....
*shrug*


i'm most likely going to Hong Kong..

my addiction and my dilemma

i've stop coffee since monday
cos i've got a new favourite beverage.
FRESH MILK.
those full cream kind.
my boobs look bigger so it must be the milk.. haha.
yeah right.. i put on weight.. 1 kg..!
it might seem little but for a 'not-so-tall' gal like me,
1 kg can make quite a diff.

however, this morning.. i had coffee *sheepish*
coffee+fresh milk= slurp

something new in the pipeline.
Hong Kong in Sept!
should i go or should i not?
great fun guaranteed.

and i really do need to get away...

the one with my oil bubble

so i've started my 'prepping the skin' regime.
Went for my first facial in years last night.
I had this little horrid oil bubble under my eye area,
courtesy of the oily makeup removal.
Thankfully Helen (who does my facial) was able to get rid of it
so i dun have to resort to laser - in the later years if ever.

It was this ugly little bump
and she was having a tough time taking the root out.
Went on for awhile and she could only get the surface oil out.
It blardee hurts mind u.
She said the root was still imbedded and cant seem to come out.
Then i said a prayer.."Lord, please please help Helen get rid of my oil bubble.. it's taking awhile and it hurts..."
After the prayer i started to feel foolish..
Whoever ask God for help on an oil bubble?! An oil bubble?!!!
It's like the least of all worries and so trivial.
Not like i'm praying for recovery from some illness.
You know, like something that warrants a prayer.
Would God actually answer such a trival prayer?


The very NEXT SEC.. Helen went.."Oh its out!"

i was stunned.
God is simply awesome!
and it shows.. hey, you can talk to God about anything! He listens.. He really does! *grins*

oh oh.. guess what i dreamt last night?
i dreamt that i got preg!
aaahhhhhhhhh......... *plop*

it must have stemmed out from what Jo and i were talking about yesterday.. having kids *gulps*

a comment made this morning got me thinking.. *sigh*
and the weather just match my thoughts.

last evening was some eventful night..

met up with Jo and Sy for dinner. It was a great way to combat the monday blues.. hanging out with your darling gals. It was impromptu. I msged them both at 3.30am the night before (or morning), checking if they are free for me to bounce some ideas (wedding) off them. You should hear all the noise they made at me being up at 3am... sounds like my mum.. hahahah!

"i slept at 1am and who would expect any msg at 3am?!!!!! You are up at 3 thinking about your wedding??"

"wat are you up doing at 335?!!!"

*guffaws*

well... ermmm........

So we met at Suntec and had Crystal Jade for dinner.. despite many grumblings from Sy. I had my favourite la mien with spring onions.. it's only $5! Then i treat them both dessert at NYDC.. to thank them for being such dears.. and allowing me to drag them out to be my sounding board.

Bounced some ideas off and some advices they gave made sense so i'm going back to re-think some plans i initially had. Jo had her wedding dinner last Dec so she is probably the best person to seek advice from.

Felt kinda bad i didnt call the rest along. But its hard to stick and focus on one subject when there are 6 gals.. It'll be great chaos.. and we wanted to keep dinner short. So.. Next time round will involve everyone! Cos the next thing we're gonna discuss is the saboing of the groom and groomsmen! *evil laughter*

We were already walking towards Citylink when zack msged me saying he wanted Kenny Rogers for dinner! *sigh* We had already left Suntec so i had to walk to Marina Square to get my hubby's dinner.. and that's where my night started to go downhill....

Had to wait 15mins for the chicken to be roasted. But zack was sweet and asked me to take a cab and he'd pay for it. I was reluctant cos i hate taking cabs. I'd rather hang on in the sardine-packed train for an additional 30mins and save that $15. But soggy chicken wouldnt taste good and he did said he'd pay for it.. haha.. so i went to search for a taxi stand. For someone who hardly ever take cabs, i wouldnt know where the vantage points are so i had to walk round and round (Marina Square is frigging huge!) in order to find a taxi stand. And by the time i found one... the queue was incredibly long. *sigh*

So i walked back into Marina Square and found another spot where 'on call' cabs drive by. Something happened here but i'm not gonna elaborate. All i wanna say is...

MAY ALL CAB SNATCHERS LOSE ALL YOUR HAIR AND BREAK OUT IN RED FAT WARTS!!! IF I EVER SEE YOU BOTH AGAIN, YOU'D BETTER RUN OR I'LL MAKE SURE YOU WISH YOU'D NEVER BEEN BORN!!! *FANGS*

then i hit my leg on those granite stone barriers. Now i'm sporting 2 lovely bumps on my shin and inner knee. Great.

so hot, sweaty, limping on 3inches stilts (and fuming).. i walked back to the train station and boarded the train home. It was already 10pm and i was hot and tired.. the lack of sleep was catching up on me. *sigh*

something cemented last night: Cabs and Ju.. just dont jibe. There was an incident with a cabdriver months ago. No more cabs for me. Nope. Not anymore.

it was some night.. the good and the bad.

well, at least someone enjoyed his dinner.. so something good came out of it.

sunday afternoon thoughts..

i'm not usually a tidbit-junkie person.
but i just came home with a bagful of tidbits
- a box of oreo
- 2 bars of kit kat chunky
- a packet of cadbury chocolate cookies

went to PP to get a bouquet of flowers for Mum Elsie.
we're having a Mothers' Day dinner today.
but the shop is closed. Sheesh.
zack said his mum wouldnt like flowers.
sigh.. wat do guys know.. *roll eyes*
(they can be so dense at times)
thats what my mum proclaimed too..

but look at her face when my father gave her some flowers (which were bought by me!). It positively glowed. Even til now, my big regret was only getting 3 stalks of flowers. I shouldnt have skimped and gotten her a more lovely bouquet instead. My mum... didnt have many lovely things in her life. What i would have showered on her now.. I miss her...

Of late, i've been on an emotional roller coaster ride.
I get happy, i get upset. All in a split second.
Little things prick me.
I push them aside and try to smile.
But they keep creeping back.
To mar the rainbow i viciously paint.

I was tougher than this.
I never bruise this easily.
I never felt so unsure about myself.
Perhaps i know when it all started.
Irrelevent as it seems.
It might actually be the root.

Maybe i just cant get used to the change.
I expect more. But i receive less.
I need affirmation.
I need the right words.
No one can give me that.

i have to get away..

"you ought to give me wedding rings.."

Just spent a good 2 hours working on the guestlist.. calling up relatives. Everything seems to be coming along well. The Bridal Album.. the wedding invites. And as i sit here, listening to our march-in song.. i started to dream....

....of how that day will unfurl

and i cant help smiling cos what i dreamt... was lovely.. and touching.
Well, it has to be.. if i have a say in it!
It's THE DAY. It's Our Day.
It has to be as perfect as i can make it.
My head is swirling.
I feel like there are dozens of channels in my head.
Shifting from one to another.
Ahhhhh....
How dim should lighting be during march-in?
Amount of dry ice during march-in?
Flowergirl? Ringbearer?
Outfit for flowergirl and matron of honour?
Jo offered to help me with the angpow box.
i'm so touched.. seriously *muaks muaks* :)

I feel the heat.
I feel the excitement!
The wheels are spinning.. in full force now!
woooohoooooo....!

But i'm still on Honeymoon gear!
Taking a little backseat cos i've mostly settled the itinerary.
Unless i got an idea for something new (which happens so very often).
Still religiously doing my daily readings on travel.
Working on this really exhilarating day trip we're gonna make.
When zack saw the spreedsheets i was working on for our honeymoon..
all he said was, "you're amazing.."
Said with fascination or exasperation, that's a question.
ahahahaha!

so now.. i'm working on spreadsheets for our wedding!

So we selected the photos for our bridal album!
2 aching backs.
3 inches thick of photos
4 blurry eyes

we went through the 3-inches thick stack of photos at least 4 times. We were so excited during the first filter, the photos were great! Zack looked really good, smile was natural and he looked real happy. My outdoor shots werent that good, fatigue showed through by then. Our studio shots were nice! That leaves us with a great headache. We hardened our hearts and ended up with 82 photos.. and still we gotta cut down by half. Yvonne was really helpful in giving us pointers.. in choosing the shots, how to arrange them etc. Come second round, enthusiatic wore off a little, especially having an idea of what the topup amount might be. By the third round, we were getting tired and vexed. i like all the shots!

Finally, we got down to 39 shots (and had to forgo some really nice ones) and the topup amount made our hearts cry. However, the amount wasn't for the topup of photos. In fact, we only got 1 extra and thankfully Yvonne didnt charge us for it. Instead of an album influxed with mountainous of shots with matt finishes, we decided to improve the quality of the material used. Got the metallic photo paper with glossy finish. The prints have metallic undertones and a subtle shimmer giving the prints a 3D quality. Once we saw one of those albums, all other albums looked bland as water (however nice the shots are). Not just the shots have to be good; good composition, good lighting, good subjects but what these good shots are printed on is equally important as well. The photo paper has to be able to bring out the beauty of the shot. It has to do them justice. It's like how you wouldnt wanna waste printing good shots on inferior quality paper. It was a tug between quality and quantity. Guess you know which one won. So we chose the cream-of-the-crop shots and did full pages. The result will be outstanding.. hopefully! Sometimes, less is really more *winks* And again, everything comes with a price *sigh*

It took us 3.5hours.. *plop*

I was quiet on the way home.. cos my heart ached so badly.... it still does!

and psyching myself to face zack's grumblings.. the bridal boutique was my call afterall.. so i'm taking the heat.. *sigh*

But God is great! cos zack got good news this morning.. he's getting bonus in May! And a good tidy sum at that! *grins* Isn't God awesome?! It's like he's taking care of us all the way. Before we even ask, He knows our needs and He provides.

Looking back at how far we've come along and what we had achieved without help from anyone. We are not holding sky-high salaried jobs but with enough to make do and enjoy some pretty frills of life. I look back and God's hand in it all is just so evident. We would never have made it without him. "Thank you Lord for your blessings!" i'm grateful.. *smile*

So......

This evening, we'd be collecting our wedding invites! Cant wait to see the final product. Next will come the part i dread most...

grocery shopping for the rich and famous

these must be magic grapes!



so let's see...

69bucks can get me:
- 1 nice piece of Victoria's Secret lingerie
- 23 plates of chicken rice = lunch for a month at work
- 4 pairs of weekday movie tickets + a nachos combo meal
- 5 novels which can last me a good 2 months
- 6 good Thomson prata meals for 2
- 7 bottles of hair mask
- 8 months of brow threading sessions
- 90 chempedak ice-cream

and 10 of these damned watermelons can get me my microwave!

just done with a conference call.
having a horrid headache.
can feel a vein throbbing.
my boss is falling sick.
we wonder why things just dont seem to go right.

so i'm off now for some retail therapy with my darling sister.
and she can talk my head off.. haha.

this also means i wouldnt see zack til tomorrow morning.
last i saw him was when i see him off to work last night :(

"i'm up.. Dunno why i cant sleep much.. Maybe it's because i miss my lao por.. :("
awwwwww.... i miss you too baby..
my hubby sure knows how to sweet talk.
but i like~!

something's in the air...

I just had the most fabulous dinner,
prepared by my darling hubby *smile*


Penne with ham chunks and minced mushroom
But that's not all.
He bought wine!
(he wanted to get me high.. haha)
It's like the first time in history this ever happened.


My sweetheart picked me up from work and cooked me dinner.
Wow... i dunno when this will ever happen again.
So i just have to blog about this!
*muaks* love ya!

...and it must be Love :)